


A Logical Seduction

by LovelyZelda



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-02
Updated: 2010-05-02
Packaged: 2017-10-09 06:18:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/83931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LovelyZelda/pseuds/LovelyZelda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spock tries to 'seduce' Bones. After failing a few times, he asks Kirk for help in the matter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Logical Seduction

Vulcans are logical in all things. Had Dr. McCoy been another Vulcan, Spock could simply have stated that, given the doctor's anatomical knowledge and their existing working relationship, they would be sexually compatible. Thus it would be logical for them in engage in some form of pre-agreed upon intercourse during one of their shared off duty periods.

Approaching the matter logically may even have worked on the captain, who had a great deal of experience with interspecies copulation and could also be quite rational when he wished to be.

Dr. McCoy, on the other hand, was one of the most emotional beings Spock had ever encountered. If approached in a perfectly logical, forthright manner, McCoy was likely to begin another tirade against rational thought or possibly announce that he was a doctor, not a prostitute.

(Attempting to point out that one was well aware of McCoy's chosen profession never seemed to make the situation any better.)

And there was another potential problem. Humans made little to no attempt to suppress or conceal their emotions, and McCoy never kept from speaking his mind. A human who thought nothing of yelling at his commanding officer for over a quarter of an hour was unlikely to keep other, more positive sentiments hidden.

Still, it was impossible to suffer from rejection without emotional attachment, so there was clearly nothing to lose.

***

"You're looking well today, doctor," said Spock.

McCoy glared at him. "Spock, do you know what a hangover is?"

"I am unfamiliar with the term."

"Of course you are. It means I feel like shit and probably look worse, so spare me your Vulcan sarcasm!"

Apparently compliments were not an effective course of action.

***

"Are you sure that's a legal move?"

The ship's computer had mentioned that, in previous eras, humans would often deliberately lose at games to show interest in or favoritism towards other humans.

As the purpose of a game was to win, this was illogical. However, given the computer's theory and Spock's goal, this was a potentially logical course of action.

"Quite certain, doctor," said Spock.

McCoy looked at him, then at the board. "Mr. Spock, I believe this is the worst game of three dimensional chess you've ever played."

"Perhaps you are just exceptionally skilled, doctor."

"Well, that's certainly a possibility." It was utterly impossible that McCoy's broad smile caused an emotional response in Spock.

"I believe that is checkmate, doctor," said Spock.

"So it is, Spock," said McCoy. "Another game?"

They traded pieces and started over. A few moves in McCoy asked, "Are you sure you're all right?"

"Perfectly all right," said Spock.

"Because no matter how 'skilled' I may be, I can't believe a Vulcan would keep making one stupid move after another."

"You forget that I am half human."

"Mr. Spock, either there is something terribly wrong with your mind or you are letting me win."

It was impossible for a Vulcan to lie. Spock was considering what to _suggest_ when McCoy stood up. "Obviously you don't think I'm a match for your superior intellect," McCoy snapped.

"That was not--"

"I'm sure I wouldn't be able to understand your _logic_," said McCoy.

Corrections needed to be made to certain computer tapes.

***

Many shipboard and planetary functions suggested that alcohol often lowered human inhibitions. Under the right circumstances and in certain quantities, it almost qualified as an aphrodisiac.

"How can I help you, Spock?" asked McCoy. The three dimensional chess incident seemed to have been forgotten. The captain had eventually intervened, although Spock assumed his hyperbolic threats were not serious.

"I would like to have a drink with you, doctor," said Spock.

"Well, this is quite an occasion," said McCoy. "What took you so long?"

The taste was unpleasant. Unfortunately the Vulcan response to distilled wine was unknown, but as alcohol was completely unknown to his father's species, Spock felt it a reasonable assumption that he would be immune to its effects.

"I'm sorry it's not the best," said McCoy. "Jim and I ran through that months ago."

"Quite all right, doctor," said Spock. "I wouldn't know the difference."

"Why the sudden interest in a 'strange human habit'?"

"Consider it an experiment."

"Make sure you pace yourself. Jim won't be happy if I have to tell him I got his first officer shitfaced."

"An interesting idiom," said Spock. "Why would one wish to induce a state with such a name?"

"It's not necessarily something you try to 'induce'," said McCoy. "Sometimes it just happens."

Spock decided it would be best not to point out that this was a potentially reckless attitude. "Would you consider that a positive, doctor?"

McCoy shrugged. "Depends on the night."

"Does anything else ever 'just happen'?"

He laughed. "Spoken like a true teetotaler. Next planet, me and Jim'll take you to the local watering hole, and...well, we'll see what happens."

This was potentially promising. Spock was about to suggest that there was no reason to wait until the next away mission when McCoy added, "Assuming you can get a pretty girl away from our illustrious captain."

Before a correction could be made, they were contacted by the bridge and ordered to the transporter room.

There was no "local watering hole", but there was an attractive humanoid female that the captain was predictably quite taken with. At least until they discovered that it was not as humanoid as previously believed and was interested in a warm blooded life form in which to lay its eggs.

***

To be frustrated required emotion. Therefore, Spock was not frustrated; he was merely dissatisfied with the results of his efforts.

"Captain, I would like your advice."

"Certainly, Spock," said Kirk. "What is it?"

"It is a...private matter."

"It's not--"

"No," said Spock. "It could be considered a related problem, but it is not...that."

"Good," said Kirk. "I'd like to think that by now you know I'd much rather have you alive and slightly embarrassed than dead from Vulcan stoicism."

"Captain--"

"Not that you can get embarrassed, of course. I hear it requires emotions."

Naturally Spock appreciated the intention of the gesture, even if he coudln't feel anything from it. "Jim, I am interested in pursuing an intimate relationship with another member of the crew."

"Which one?" asked Kirk. He quickly added, "I don't want to step on any toes."

"I would rather not divulge that information."

"But you wanted advice?"

"Lately, I have endeavored to approach this person in a human manner. It has not been successful."

"How recently are we talking?" asked Kirk. "Never mind, it's none of my business."

Mentioning a time frame was a mistake. Jim was very observant and could easily piece things together, especially since he frequently talked with McCoy.

"Just be yourself, Spock," said Kirk. "Follow your instincts. Or logic. Whatever you want to call it." He grinned. "After all, it's always worked for me."

"Sometimes a bit too well, captain."

"Yes, well, I can't help it if shapeshifting insect-women find me very attractive," said Kirk. "Just think, Spock, you could've been a godfather."

"I will keep that in mind if it happens again," said Spock. "Or should I say 'when'?"

Kirk shuddered slightly. "Let's say 'if'."

Had he been human, Spock would have felt the need to make certainly distastefully emotional promises regarding the captain's safety. Since he was not, he simply said, "It will not happen again."

Kirk almost immediately brightened. "Don't be so sure, Spock," he said. "I am irresistible.

***

"Dr. McCoy, there is something I would like to discuss with you."

"Of course, Spock, have a seat," said McCoy. "Frankly, I've been worried about you. You haven't been yourself lately. I would've mentioned it sooner, but with that..._thing_ trying to turn Jim into a seahorse and that transporter malfunction..."

"Doctor, I wish to speak to you as a colleague, not a patient."

"Understood. What's on your mind?"

"I find you to be a highly emotional, almost utterly irrational being."

"As usual, I'll take that as a compliment."

"However, I presume that you are more than adequate at various reproductive acts and feel that we would be sexually compatible. I feel that the only logical course of action would be to test this presumption."

McCoy blinked. "'More than adequate'," he said. "This must be that famous Vulcan charm that Nurse Chapel keeps going on about." Spock couldn't understand his expression. "And is this an entirely logical decision on your part?"

"My actions are always guided by logic," said Spock.

McCoy leaned over and kissed him in the human manner. "How about now?"

"My theory appears to be correct," said Spock. "As a scientist, I find that quite satisfying."

"Spock, I want you to keep in mind that I'm a human male." McCoy pressed his palm against Spock's and began to curl and uncurl his fingers.

"Our species are not so different that I am unable to distinguish between human males and females," said Spock.

"What I mean is, I like to hear that I'm doing a good job." McCoy pulled Spock to his feet. "Now, I'll understand if that's too much to ask..." He brought Spock's hand to his mouth and, one by one, began to suck his fingers.

"I will try to--"

"There's not going to be any 'try'," McCoy said as he slid his other hand up Spock's shirt and roughly circled his thumb over a nipple. "Other than this hand thing, I've got no idea what I'm doing, logical theory or not." He lightly bit the tip of Spock's index finger.

"That is a rather ingenious strategy, doctor." He wondered what benefit there could be to manual contact, given the relative insensitivity of human hands. "Despite your misgivings, you're doing quite well."

"'Quite well,'" McCoy muttered around Spock's thumb. "I think we can do a bit better than that." Moving Spock's hand to his waist, he kissed him again, letting his own hands continue to roam over Spock's upper body.

Spock reached under McCoy's shirt for the nerve cluster at the base of his spine. "Lower," McCoy said in his ear. "Try for right about _here_."

McCoy pushed against him, both of them erect. It was becoming difficult to view this from a purely logical standpoint. It became impossible once McCoy unfastened Spock's pants and wrapped his hand around his erection. Spock imitated him and quickly matched his rhythm.

Thinking, even thinking illogically, was almost impossible. The sensations from his hand and McCoy's were pleasantly overwhelming, especially when McCoy kissing him again. Spock was beginning to see the appeal of this rather strange human gesture.

He struggled to remain in control. It would be inconvenient and possibly rude to achieve climax ahead of his partner (he still wasn't quite sure of the human custom and assumed it would not be a welcome question at this point in time).

A mind meld would make things much easier to maneuver, but he did not know how McCoy would respond. Initiating a mind meld was unwise as it could be interpreted as a violation of trust, not because it might bring up certain thoughts Spock would prefer not to discuss at this time.

Given the additional stimulation, Spock's attempt at restraint was unsuccessful. "Doctor, I'm s--"

"Nothing to apologize for, Spock," said McCoy. "Unless you stop."

Orgasm fading, Spock ignored the impulse to slump into a chair. As his hand grew almost hyper sensitive, he focused instead on McCoy's increasingly ragged breathing. Finally, his fingers dug into Spock's arm as he climaxed almost as quietly as a Vulcan.

McCoy briefly wrapped an arm around Spock's shoulders, then stepped away. "I've got a spare uniform you can borrow," he said. "Long enough to get you back to your own quarters, anyway."

"A wise course of action, doctor."

The ship suddenly tilted, throwing them both against a wall. "Or long enough to get to the bridge and find out what the hell's gone wrong now," said McCoy.

***

It was the usual sort of problem, solved just before the shields gave out completely. As usual, it was not solved before certain logical errors by certain medical officers needed to be pointed out. Or before the term "green blooded son of a bitch" entered an otherwise reasonable discussion with the captain.

"Warp three, Mr. Sulu," said Kirk. He glanced at Spock. His eyes seemed to linger on his insignia. "I hope that didn't interrupt anything, Mr. Spock."

"Captain, obviously my duty to the ship comes before anything else," said Spock.

"Well, now that she's out of danger, why don't you do change into something that actually fits?"

It was extremely fortunate that Vulcans were incapable of embarrassment.


End file.
